Finding each other through the dark
by WinchesterHardyLover
Summary: During a hunt Dean is hurt. Sam stays up all night worrying about his brother. While Dean is sleeping Sam confesses his feelings to Dean thinking he is asleep. Dean/Sam Wincest.
1. Chapter 1

There current hunt wasn't going as they thought it would. It was supposed to be a simple salt and burn. They were hunting an angry spirit of a girl Anna Marie Cleams who had been held captive and tortured by her father in his house. The girl hated all men. Whenever a man came into the house she would try to kill them. They found her body buried in a crawl space of the basement. Sam was digging up the body of Anna, while Dean distracted the spirit. Sam had just finished digging her up when he heard a shout from his brother. "SAM HURRY UP!" Dean shouted just as the spirit through him into the wall.  
Sam quickly put salt and gasoline on the body and set it on fire. The spirit was destroyed and Sam quickly climbed out of the crawl space and ran to check on his brother.  
"Dean!" Sam knelt next to his brother. Dean was currently unconscious and had a pretty bad gash on his head.  
"Dean! Wake up! Please." Dean didn't respond for almost 15 minutes. Sam was started to get really worried.  
"Oh god Dean please wake up. I don't know what I'll do without you." Sam was starting to cry when he heard his brother let out a whimpered moan.  
"Dean? Come on open your eyes." Dean slowly opened his eyes and came to.  
"S-sammy?"  
"Yeah Dean it's me. How do you feel?" Sam looked at his brother with worry and concern in his eyes.  
"My head hurts an everything is really fuzzy."  
"Don't worry Dean you're gonna be alright. I'm gonna get you back to the motel."

Sam drove the Impala back to the motel with Dean laying in the back seat. Once they were in the room Sam cleaned and stitched the gash on Dean's head and watched him as he slept. Knowing Dean had a concussion he didn't feel comfortable sleeping. He sat on his bed facing his brother. Sam finally realizes how close he was to losing his brother, the love of his life. Dean didn't know how Sam really felt because he knew that his brother would hate him for being so sick. Sam started to tear up at the thought of losing his brother.  
"Dean why do you always have to try and be the superhero. I thought I was gonna lose you." Sam said to sleeping Dean. Sam knew that he would never be able to say this to Dean when he was awake.  
"I don't know what I would do if I lost you. I love you. If you knew how much I loved you, you would never want to see me again. You would think i'm sick. Hell, I know im sick. I fell in love with my own brother for gods sake. But I would rather be your brother, then to not have you at all. I love you so much. I can't imagine life without you."  
Sam thought Dean was asleep the whole time he is pouring his heart out to his "sleeping" brother, but really Dean is awake. He hears the whole thing, but he isn't mad or discussed by his brother. Truthfully he is hopeful, because secretly he has been in love with Sammy since his brother his puberty. Dean decides to confront Sammy tomorrow about it and finally make Sammy his.

Sam carefully shakes Dean awake the next morning.  
"Dean wake up." Dean's eyes flutter open.  
"Huh? Oh morning Sammy."  
"How is your head feeling Dean do you need any pain meds?" Sam asks his brother with worry.  
"No I'm good thanks." Dean takes a good look at Sam and realizes that his brother didn't sleep at all last night. His brother had dark circles under his eyes and looked exhausted.  
"Hey let's go get something to eat at the dinner. I'm starved." Dean told his brother as he got up to get dressed.  
"Are you sure? You should probably take it easy. You hit your head pretty hard last night."  
"I'm fine Sammy now lets go." Dean decided he was gonna talk to his brother once they got back to the motel after eating.

Once they were back at the motel, Dean dug up the courage to talk to Sam about last night an what he heard.

"Hey Sammy?"

"Yeah Dean?"

"Can I talk to you about something?"

"Uh sure." Sam started to worry 'is his brother hurt or...did he find out about his feelings for him...OH GOD he found out he is probably gonna tell me to leave' he thought to himself.

"Uh I heard you last night. I heard everything you said and I want to know if it was true. And please don't lie to me." Dean could see his brothers demeanor change.

Sam looked at the ground is shame. He knew what that his worse nightmare was coming true.  
"Yeah I meant every word Dean. I'm in love with you. You don't have to say it either I know you don't feel the same way and that i'm a sick freak. Just please don't leave me i'll try and ignore my sick feelings and I swear I will never act on my feelings just please don't leave me." by the time Sam was done confessing he was sobbing and shaking with fear that his brother was gonna make him leave.  
Sam was now sitting on the bed with his face in his hands. He knew that his brother was probably gonna either beat the shit out of him or make him leave.  
"Sammy. Sam what are you talking about I would never make you leave." Dean noticed that Sam hadn't heard him. He knelt don't in front of his brother and touched his shoulder, but pulled back when Sam flinched.  
"Sammy I'm not going to hurt you. Please look at me." Sam heard the genuine care and worry in his brothers voice maybe there was a chance that Dean felt the same way. Sam slowly looked up at Dean. He was shocked at what he saw. Dean's eyes were full of love, care, and concern. What Dean said next is what Sam ha always hope to hear.  
"I love you Sammy. I'm not gonna make you leave or hurt you." Dean smiled at Sam.  
"Really? You feel the same way how long?"  
"Since you hit puberty. I realized how much you had changed. You were getting muscles and getting bigger. I thought I was sick because I was getting turned on by my little brother. I didn't want to hurt you so I hid my feelings. How long have you been in love with me Sammy?"  
"I have been in love with you since I was in high school. That was one of the reasons I left for Stanford...I could stand being around and knowing that you didn't feel the same way." Dan was shocked at his brothers confession, but he also caught something else that he had said.  
"You said that it was one of the reasons you left. What was the other reason?" dean asked his brother. Dean noticed Sam's face pale immediately. "Sam? What's wrong?"  
"I-I...you'll hate me if I tell you the other reason..." Dean sat beside his brother.  
"I could never hate you baby boy now tell me what is the other reason you left?"

"Dad."

"Dad? What about dad? What does he have to do with you leaving?"

"He found out about me?"

"found what out baby boy? That you gay?"

Sam shook his head. Dean realized his brother was fighting tears. What had their father done to his baby boy.

"Dad found out that I was in love with you. He was so angry and discussed with me. H-he..." Sam trailed off at the end not want to tell Dean the rest and have him hate him think he was weak.

"What did dad do Sammy? Please tell me I won't hate you I promise." Sam knew that dean never broke a promise he made to Sam.

"When he found out he beat me every day until I left for college and he... raped me." Sam got quiet at the last part hoping Dean wouldn't hear it. Dean sat their in shock how did he not notice what was happening to his baby boy all those years.

"Sammy why didn't you ever tell me?" Dean asked almost in tears himself.

"Dad said he would tell you how I felt and that you would hate me too. I couldn't lose you as well. You were all I had left. Plus you worshiped him. He was your hero..." Dean pulled his brother into his arms.

"I'm so sorry I didn't protect you from him. No one can ever compare to you baby boy. I promise that he will never lay a hand on you again."

"But what if wants you start hunting with him again?" Sam asked afraid to look his brother in the eyes.

''Sammy look at me. There is no contest I will always choose you. I meant it when I said I love you. We're together forever if you want." Dean looked at Sam with hope.

"You mean it? I do want forever with you Dean." Sam leaned in and kissed his brother for the first time. They both knew that they were meant to be together they could feel it. Dean didn't care what their father thought. Sammy was his and he was Sammy's forever. If their dad tried to break them up or hurt his baby boy Dean would kill him.


	2. Chapter 2

Dean spent the whole night reassuring Sam that he loved him, and that their father would pay for what he did to him and that he would never hurt him again. The next morning Dean decided to go and get breakfast for him and Sam. Sam was still asleep and Dean didn't have the heart to wake him. Knowing his brother would think Dean regretted last night, if he woke up and him not be there. Dean took the traditional notepad that was in motels and wrote Sam a note telling him where he went.

Dean got some donuts, coffee, and some fruit for his brother knowing how much his baby boy loved fruit.

Back at the motel room Sam reached over to the other side of the bed where Dean had slept, but frowned when he realized that his brother wasn't there. He looked around the room and didn't see him. He then noticed the piece of paper on Dean's pillow telling him where he was. Sam felt a flood of relief. He thought Dean had left him because of last night. Just then the door to the motel opened and in walked Dean.

"Hey baby boy I see you're awake. I got us some breakfast and coffee." Dean said smiling at Sam. Sam joined Dean at the table and waited for Dean to get out what he bought for breakfast. Dean got out the box of donuts and fruit.

"I saw they had fruit and I know how much you like it so I got you some." Sam started to blush.

"Thanks Dean. You didn't have too, but it looks really good." Sam said smiling at his brother.

Sam and Dean eat break and chatted a bit just enjoying each other's company. They were just about finished eating when Dean's phone started to ring. He looked at the caller ID and it said "Dad". Dean let out a growl that startled Sam. Sam could see the obvious anger on his face; he immediately knew who was calling. It was their father, the one who had hurt Sam and the one whom his brother wanted to kill right now.

"Dean?" Dean looked at Sam and could see the slight fear in his eyes.

"It's okay Baby boy don't worry about him. I'm going to see what he wants." Dean answered the phone. "Hello?"

"Hey Dean. How are you doing?"

"I'm okay dad. What do you want?"

"Well I was hoping that we could meet up. I have a case that I could use some help on."

"I just finished up on a case I'm in Salida, Colorado."

"I'm not far from you I'll be there about three." With that John hung up.

"What did dad want?" Sammy asked his brother quietly.

"He wanted my help on a hunt. He'll be here by 3."

"Oh. Okay…" 'Deans is going to leaving me to go hunting with dad.'

"Sammy I'm not going with him. I want to confront the bastard for what he did to you. He's not going to hurt you ever again Sammy I promise." Dean went over to his brother and pulled him up from the chair and into a hug.

"I love you Sammy."

"I love you too Dean."

Around three o'clock john's truck pulled into the motel parking lot. He parked beside the impala. Dean heard him pull up as well as Sam. Dean saw fear spread through his brother. Dean walked up to Sammy.

"Don't worry baby boy you'll be fine. Just remember I love you and whatever he says is a lie okay?" Dean kissed Sam softly.

"I trust and believe you Dean. And I love you too." There was a knock at the door they both knew who it was. Dean let go of his brother to answer the door.

"Hey Dad." Dean said after opening the door letting John in. John came into the motel room and closed the door behind him. John realized there was someone else there because the bathroom door was closed. Dean noticed this 'Sam must have slipped in there when he went to open the door.

"Dean who is in the bathroom?" John asked suspiciously. Just then Sam decided to exit the bathroom.

"S-Sam? What are you doing I thought you left to go to Stanford?" Dean notices the edge in his father's voice. He was trying to start a fight and break Sammy down. Dean had to stop this now he wasn't going to let his father hurt Sam again he promised Sammy.

"Some things happened and he decided to start hunting with me again. We actually make a great team isn't that right Sammy?"

"Yeah we aren't too bad. Still a little rusty, but I'm getting back into the swing of things."  
"Well you wouldn't be rusty if you hadn't abandoned your family for college." John said fiercely. Dean looked at Sam seeing the hurt in his eyes. This had gone far enough.

"That's enough!" Dean saw Sam jump out of the corner of his eye. He didn't mean to scare Sam.

"Excuse me?! You better watch your tone with me boy!"

"Shut up dad I've had enough of your bullshit I know what you did to Sam all those years and I know why Sam really left for Stanford." John did something that Dean never expected him to do he smiled.

"So the disgusting Whore told you his sick feelings for you did he huh."

"Don't you ever talk about Sammy like that ever again. He is neither of those things. No matter how he feels about someone he didn't deserve to be beaten and raped. He was your son and you treated him like garbage. The only disgusting person in this room is you!" Dean shouted furiously. Sam was afraid of how angry Dean was, but he knew that the anger was directed towards him at all.

"What have you done Sam. You have corrupted your brother with your sick feelings."

"WHAT?! Sam didn't corrupt me the only corrupt person here is you and it's time for you to leave. If you ever come near me or Sammy again I will kill you."

"You're going to choose your disgusting brother over me?"

"Yeah there's no contest." John knew not to doubt Dean's threat. "Get out John."

Sam knew that Dean didn't consider John as their father now since he had him by his first name. john turned and left, Dean hoped that this would be last time they ever saw him, but he knew that it was to good to be true. Dean knew that they would probably see john again in the future, but hopefully not for a long time.


End file.
